Hello Gentelmen, Welcome to what looks like is going to be the start of something beautiful… The Kiss & Tell Podcast.
This is going to be a space for where you can get some real honest and genuine tips from whom I consider to be the best out there at what they do. Not only am I going to squeeze the guests for some top insiders secrets but to also give a run through of one of their most outstanding performances as a master seducer.
In this Kiss & Tell Podcast I invite very good friend of mine gentlemen and dandy Mr Gareth Jones in for a chin wag.
Gareth Jones is founder of Artoftheplayboy.com where he works with men that want to refine their lifestyles to become the true playboy they desire to be.
This podcast was recorded whilst Gareth stayed with me over the course of a week here in the UK. Often when you move round the ring with someone with such credited ability as a master seducer some beautiful things happen. To say we painted the town red is an understatement. Gareth is a firm believer of creating that movie moment as am I and I can assure you there were plenty more movie moments other than Skyfall. Enjoy.
- Being a playboy
- How to pick up a woman at the bar
- Gareth Jone’s Kiss & Tell
Johnny: Hello and welcome to the Kiss and Tell Podcast. I’m Johnny Cassell and today I have in the studio with me Mister Gareth Jones; head principle, founder of ArtofthePlayboy.com.
Johnny: Hello there, and today you’re gonna be sharing with us what your angle of teaching is, how different it is. You have got quite a unique angle of teaching. I brought you on here, I want you to share a few tips to the listeners. You’re the playboy, what is the art of it?
Gareth: Ah, the art is the execution of the playboy. Being a playboy or the concept of the playboy doesn’t necessarily mean an all-encompassing lifestyle but the concept of the playboy is somebody that has a distinct and unique ability to make the world around him better wherever he goes. In the thirties, forties, fifties, sixties, some would say seventies, there was a group of men – JFK, Howard Hughs, Porfirio Rubirosa, that basically went around the world and lived life to the extreme. They had this lifestyle that was enviable. They married the most beautiful women, travelled to the most beautiful places, did the most exciting things and these men put above all their own pleasure. This is kind of like the discussion of selfishness that can get a little hairy. This does not mean they did this at the expense of other people. There’s a little bit of stigma about enjoying yourself all the time because people assume you’re doing it at the expense of others. You know we were talking about last night, everyone has that person in their life that is a great addition to any situation. That person that can show up to a cocktail party or show up to a birthday party or show up to a karaoke night or a club night or a dinner at your parents place, it will always be great, that person will always be a profound addition.
J: He is the reason people are having fun.
G: Yeah, he is the reason people are having fun. The reason why an environment is balanced, dynamic, and is often the glue of situations. And when we evaluate it, that is an expository for everyone. Everyone can reverse engineer this and become that person. I was saying, again last night, one of my very close friends, he said to me a very long time ago, he said there’s two types of people in this world; he said there’s people who make the fun, and he said there’s people who look for fun. And knowing that allows you to choose which type of person you’re going to be. So Art Of The Playboy is geared towards taking guys who are already good with girls and refining their lifestyle and their tactics and their technique and the way that they execute themselves by using methods and ways that will simply improve the lives of everyone around them. I believe very sincerely there are two important things in the world. Number one; take care of your own stuff. Take care of the things you need to do and make yourself happy and make sure that you are complete and you are not hurting in anyway. And then number two is; make better the world around you. As we know from being prescient, aware individuals, there are people out there that don’t have the smarts to recognise anybody around them. There are people tripping on the ground, there’s people out there just living from day to day, whether they’re working at a Starbucks or working in a movie theatre or taking out your trash or could be working at an office working in some really high-paid job. They don’t have the presence of mind to understand that the world around them depends on themselves.
J: So what you’re saying here, it’s quite unique what you’re talking about here, is this right here is the bigger picture that you’re putting across for people here. You’re not interested in people who are starting out as beginners. This is a refinement.
G: Yeah. There are enough people out there to teach beginners. There are people out there who are frankly less expensive than I, who are qualified to teach why you should approach a girl, or helping somebody getting the gusto up and get out there and talk to that girl, and you wanna talk to that girl you gotta go meet her. That’s a great art and it’s very important.
J: So Gareth, what is your style of approach then? They know all the beginner stuff, they come to you and they wanna take it to the next step. We talked the other day about the approach being really smooth, catching that movie moment. We talked about the pros and the cons of that. What would be your perfect approach?
G: My perfect approach was in Miami. I was in Miami, a hotel called the Fontainebleau Hotel
J: Wait, wait, is this the kiss and tell? Is this what’s going on?
G: You want me to do that now?
J: Okay well as this is the Kiss and Tell Podcast, we have Gareth Jones giving his kiss and tell right now.
G: I’ll tell you the beginning, the end is very standard and you can fill in the blanks but the beginning is something that I’m very proud of and it just works. You know you’re lying awake at night thinking about, will something work, how can I execute this, and then you go and you do it and it follows the plan? I was in the Fontainebleau Hotel. For those of you that don’t know, I think, it’s my personal opinion that it’s the most beautiful hotel in Miami. Now I’m a bit of a James Bond geek, as you may know.
J: Really? What’s the time, we gotta be off somewhere soon.
G: Yeah we have to leave to go and see James Bond. So for anyone who is just as nerdy as I am, the Fontainebleau Hotel is the hotel at the beginning of Goldfinger where he’s laying outside getting a massage and it does the big swoop in and it says welcome to Miami and then the guy’s died. I found this out before I had gone, it was just absolutely astounding and I was, you know, geeking out tremendously. So I’m lying in bed, thinking on my nights out what am I gonna do. And I decided I would get suited and booted and this is exactly what happened. I did something rare, that I never do. I had a hotel dry clean my suit. I don’t dry clean often because it’s bad for the fabrics but I wanted to be crisp and ready to rock and roll. I had a shirt dry cleaned too which is very rare for me too. Nice, crisp, dark suit. Dark, leg shirt with a dark tie. But dressed to the nines, everything was starched, everything was pressed. I had just been to the tailor so everything was laid out. I had polished my own shoes, which is something I really enjoy doing. I know, right?
J: We see a lot of this from you, Gareth. I think that’s enough of the podcast altogether, right? Some styling tips from Mr Jones himself.
G: I wasn’t wearing sock garters with that, but I did have my cigarette case. My little steel Colibri cigarette case which is in my hand right now. I walked down to the lobby. The lobby is big, there’s I think two bars in the lobby, and it’s just giant because it opens up into several clubs. But you know it’s just like any lobby. So I had sat down in the corner. I like sitting in the corner because I can see everything that’s going on. Bravo and I always talked about this, it’s a similarity. I learnt it from theatre, being able to observe people and he learnt it from the military, finding safety and points of power and that. So I sat in the corner. The waitress came over to me after I sat down and you know, gave her a lusty look. The waitress came over and if you can imagine the light tango playing in the background. If you can imagine the soft turquoise and white darkness of that Miami atmosphere with the frosted glass lit underneath, the deep blues. It was very, very nice. So I sat down and the waitress came over. She brought me a drinks menu and asked me what I wanted, what I’d like, so I ordered a bottle of champagne.
J: Of course.
G: Because you know what? Sometimes you just gotta drink champagne. One of my favourite drinks, and I know, it’s just the silliest thing. Please, for anybody listening, do not think that I don’t know this is silly. Do not think I’m taking myself seriously in this. So I ordered a bottle of champagne. And one glass. Ready for it. And I sat and I watched as these three girls at the other end of the room talked, obviously gossiped about whatever it was going on. Yack and yack and yack and yack and yack. And they were talking, they were chatting, and I was looking at her and the one closest to me of the three was very attractive. Very, very attractive. But they weren’t repulsively hot. You know when you see a girl, like when we were in the mall the other day and we saw this girl, she was skinny and wearing a short skirt and she was wearing those tall heels and it was just very tacky? These girls were just very well dressed. Like one had a light jacket, little black dress. And I say this and I wish, I wish I could just prove to you I wasn’t lying, but the girl I was attracted to was wearing a little red dress. Beautiful red dress.
G: That’s it, oof, the sound you make when someone punches you in the stomach. Exactly. So I had looked at these girls. And you know if you’ve ever seen Crazy Stupid Love where he says, wow you’re really wearing that dress like you’re doing it a favour. That’s a lie. Me sitting over there for the past two hours not being able to take my eyes off you, that’s a fact.
J: I like that line a lot. It’s a good line.
G: That’s pretty much how I felt. I was just looking at this girl and I couldn’t take my eyes off of her. The waitress came over to check up on me after you know three quarters of a glass of champagne and I said, excuse me, what is that girl over there drinking? She said she’s drinking an apple martini, which you know, if you know anything about club life or lounge life it’s just a fucking cop out. That’s
like, I want a sweet drink but I wanna get drunk. And it’s usually for girls that often times don’t know anything about drinks. To excuse myself, if you know a lot about drinks and you just happen to like a very good apple martini I apologise, but we’re generalising here. So I told the waitress, I said, do me a favour, send that girl a mojito. And she said, oh, okay, and she had this smirk on her face too, she knew what was going on here.
J: You’re creating the mood, Mr Jones.
G: I’m creating the mood. And to make it even worse she says to me, who shall I say it’s from? Well in my mind she said, who shall I say it’s from. She probably said, what do you want me to say when she asks who it’s from. And I know you’re gonna tease me for this but I went back to Schindler’s List.
J: Oh for god’s sake, every time we get together, we’re talking about Germanly, Germany, Hitler,
G: We’re germanly talking about Germany.
J: We’re just generally, germanly talking.
G: So there’s a great line in the scene, it’s the scene in the beginning, which is one of the best lines by Liam Neeson, sends him over a round of drinks, and the man says, who shall I say it’s from? And Liam Neeson says, tell them it’s from me. And the waitress said who shall I say it’s from and I said, tell her it’s from me. So she kind of like gets all this like, here’s my cocktail life, and it’s been made a little more interesting. So she troops back to the bar and orders a mojito. And you can see her and the bartender talking and there are quite a few people in this place but you can watch this, anything is visible, you can see it transpiring. Skip a bit. The drink walks over. She sets it down. And the girl does that kind of like, oh no no, I didn’t order this, sorry, no I didn’t, and it was very self-deprecating, but she was still just beautiful. And she was saying, oh no it’s not me, and then like in the movies the waitress turns and points to me and everyone in the table looks over. And I’ve got my champagne in my hand, and I just nod. And the girl like raises her glass to me and then goes back to her friends who are like, what is that guy, oh my god, what is going on? And I was like, nailed it. Here we go, right? So, the waitress goes off and like smiles at me or whatever and the girl is drinking her drink but she’s doing that thing like she’s a little bit embarrassed, so you can tell she’s saying to her friends like, is he looking at me? Is he looking at me? Is he looking at me? And they’re like giggling and laughing and smiling and saying yeah he is. And I just mad dogged her, you know I was just looking at her because it was like in that scenario. I adore looking at women like that. So I let a little bit of time past, they giggled and they laughed and they smiled and I stood up. And I walked over with my quarter of a glass of champagne. And I said, hello. And they looked at me and they said hello. I stuck out my hand. And I went counter-clockwise around the table. You know, as we would say, obstacle, obstacle, target. And I said, my name’s Gareth. I shook their hands as they introduced me. And I said, you know I’ve been sitting over there watching you, and I think I’ve outdone myself. And they said, what? And I said, well I ordered a whole bottle of champagne, and I don’t think I’m gonna be able to finish it by myself. And the girls kinda looked at me. And I said, will you help me? And they said, yeah, okay. So I turned and I looked at the girl, you know, smiling. I went to the waitress, who at this point, despite all of the other people in the room, is now dying to watch what’s going on. I turn with the slightest of gestures and she’s already halfway over.
J: you enjoy delivering the beauty and the elegance.
G: It’s so important. So she comes over and I say, can I have three more glasses for this champagne and she says of course. And in the amount of time it takes her to go get three more glasses, I’ve brought the girls over, we’ve arranged the chairs and I’ve sat them down. I’ve sat down the two friends and I’ve taken the girl by the arm. I’ve just touched her on the arm and she knows there’s gonna be some communication. We’ve set down the glasses, I pour the champagne, which actually almost ends the bottle and I was like, oh jeez. And I said, now that we’ve got drinks sorted, I’m gonna go have a cigarette. Do you girls mind if I take your friend for a moment? And let me ask you this question, do you think these girls who are now sitting at a table with a brand new bottle of champagne with a guy who’s been nothing but charming, give a fuck if I borrow their friend?
J: Guys, you just got some amazing bit of material there. How to disarm four obstacles. Oh Jesus.
G: Here’s the thing. I mean I brought her outside, and you can do anything as you do, you know, escalate, or anything you want, but the argument I’m gonna get from the PUA community about that, which is why this story has only come out after I’ve done my thing, is well you shouldn’t have to spend that amount of money to pick up a chick. You know, it’s just one girl. You can’t be spending that money every night. I mean there’s two arguments. The first is very cocky, you know, yeah you can’t spend any money. You can’t. But the second argument is, yes you’re absolutely right. But for me, that moment is what I live for.
J: That just had to happen right there.
G: It just, it had to be done, you know. When you take a girl on an amazing date, and its nothing but incredible and everything is amazing, I mean we’ve gone out to Belgrade and you go to these fancy restaurants and these jitzy musicians come up and they play this phenomenal music, and you’re there, a candlelit dinner outside on a patio overlooking a cobblestone street. If you’ve got a hundred dollars in your bank account and that dinner is ninety nine dollars, you damn well better pay for that. That’s it. That’s that moment. And that moment and that efficiency of style and grace is so important to me. I think it is something that can’t be replicated. There is no substitution for class. There are ways to do things without spending money, of course, because it’s not about money. It’s about value.
J: Yeah I mean the way you delivered that conveyed a lot of value and social intelligence. It wasn’t about just buying the girl a drink. It was everything that came with it. It’s okay to buy a girl a drink but it’s the way you do it.
G: Yep. Absolutely. And there are, especially in the community, I mean you look at Los Angeles, the ‘don’t buy a girl a drink’ rule. People don’t understand why that’s a rule. Still. To this day. They don’t understand why I can buy a girl a drink and she’ll be charmed and he can buy a girl a drink and she’ll be grossed out.
J: Because they think that buying a girl a drink is an exchange of currency of conversation which is absolute ludicrous.
G: Why you would do that in any circumstance. And when you bring up the idea of social intelligence, that is something that is probably the most general term for what I wanna teach. You talk about these little things. So if you walk by a club and it’s got curtains over the door, you see the doorway, maybe it’s a small bar. If those curtains are coming out, it means the bar’s empty because the air-conditioning is moving through that bar so quickly that it’s pushing against the curtains that are pushing out. So little things like that. J: Yeah it’s a good observation.
G: These bits of awareness. My favourite example is when you’re waiting at a bar. Let’s say you’ve got a long bar in a club. It’s always packed right in the middle of that bar, right? And on the ends it’s very empty. So what does the fucking AFC do, he goes to the end. And does the bartender ever go down to that end?
J: Hell no
G: Hell no, right, cos he’s not making money. So what ends up happening is you end up scooching closer and closer and closer and closer until you finally get to the middle, which takes ten times as long as it should. If you go wait behind that 6 person que at the bar, you’re going to get to that bar faster, cos the bartender wants to make money and serve drinks. He’s gonna stand in the middle and point at people. He’s gonna filter out all these people and it’s gonna create this kind of wave moment where people are moving in and moving out. From the sides, they’re moving in, but if you go straight in the middle, it’s almost as if you’ll cut straight down the middle and you’ll get there faster.
J: Not even that, it’s displaying low value just standing on your own. What if your wingman or your buddy needs to go to the toilet or something and you’re sat there on your Jack Jones? You know? You’re looking lonely. I’m always telling my students, just get deep in the bar, get deep in the bar.
G: Yeah, I understand that. I think that that’s a very valid point and that’s something that I would definitely help somebody or teach somebody who needs to be that party guy, who needs to be that up guy who’s giving value in terms of fun and excitement, but I like to do something a little bit different. If I’m suited and booted, I can go out in Sydney, and there’s this club called The Ivy, which is pretty much the biggest, most well-known club. And people in Sydney dress shit. They just are. Literally, white sneakers, cargo shorts, tank top to get in this club, right? So imagine my surprise when Gareth Jones turns up with a suit and bowtie. Now there are certain things to be said for that. There’s value, right? Obviously from my angle, haha, look how great I am, dressed up, but at the other side soon you’re gonna attract a lot of attention. This is the idea of peacocking. The guys that put on these fuzzy hats and boas who don’t have the inner game. So I can sit in the corner at a college bar in a suit and still be the guy that girls wanna talk to. Whereas there are a lot of guys out there who, you know, I’m sure whenever people start suiting and booting they start doing these things where they think they’re gonna be a little bit different. You know the old black suit, black shirt, white tie? You know you see that guy at the bar like that?
J: Oh jeez, wait a minute. I think there’s actually a picture of me online like that.
G: There’s probably a picture of you online, don’t worry, we’ve all been there. I was in Austin, Texas with some students and one of my students reminded me, he said, remember next time we go to Austin to dress more casual. And I said, why? And he said, well remember last time that girl came up to you and told you, you were overdressed. I was like, say that again. He was like, you were at that bar and that girl came up to you and told you, you were overdressed. I was like, I was at a bar, and a girl came up to me and told me I was overdressed. I was at a bar. A girl came up to me. A girl came up to me. A girl came up to me. And what happened then? I said, why do you think I’m overdressed? Oh everyone’s casual. Well that’s cool. So are people who are overdressed not cool? No, no they’re cool. So when you’re talking to me, you’re not talking to someone who’s cool, you’re talking to someone you think should just dress a little differently. I don’t think you should dress differently, I just think you should just be a bit more… If me dressing this way introduces me to a girl like you, I’m gonna dress this way all the time. Oh shit, here we go. You know? So, bringing it back to that point I was making, if you can hack it, if your vibe, if your intent is to shoot out sexuality then it doesn’t matter where you are or what you’re doing. The value stuff, the high value game, the worrying about looking on your own is very different but it is very, very important and what you’re talking about is absolutely right. There are some guys who need every little advantage. I do believe take every advantage. But I think there is an advantage of being the guy who can comfortably sit by himself as well. It’s not so much a club kind of thing. If you go to a club in London or in Los Angeles just strolling in and having a drink, it’s like, that’s not a real thing. You look like a dickface. You know, I’m here at My Studio or Greystone and I’m just having a drink by myself in the corner. Nah, you’re not fooling anybody. You’re here by yourself and you’re trying to talk to girls but you’re not talking to girls. But The Lounge or The W and it’s a very different story.
J: The W lounge in Hollywood, jeez I had some fun when I was there last time. That’s a whole different podcast altogether.
G: Yeah, that’s not called kiss and tell.
J: It’s like the Scarface staircase, huh?
G: Yeah, great, huh?
J: Yeah. Okay that’s great, Gareth, really. There’s two ways of being that man in the corner, basically is what you’re telling me there. Beautiful. Is there anything else you wanna add, Gareth? It’s been great having you on.
G: I know, I’m very pleased to be here. Thank you.
J: You’ve been doing a bit of a euro tour actually and this is your final stop but
G: Yeah this is my post-final stop. But then I go to Reims too so it’s kind of like, this is the closest to the final stop that I have ever been, how about that?
J: Awesome. So how can people, if they’re interested in finding you maybe in Paris, you got a bit of time to maybe… G: I always say Facebook is the best way to contact me. I am www.facebook.com/thegarethjones and fingers crossed in the next few weeks my website will be up. It’s www.artoftheplayboy.com which I have no idea how we got that url.
J: Yeah, that’s gotta be a sought after one, that.
G: Nine dollars a month or something like that, or nine dollars a year, something like that? Phenomenal. So yeah www.artoftheplayboy will be up. I work with a lot of people. I work with Sasha Daygame. We just did three residentials, two here in London and then one in Belgrade and then I did two euro tours with James Marshal and the natural lifestyles. Johnny Coops and Sasha Daygame came along for that as well and that was just a blast as well. We went through Prague and Budapest and Belgrade with a short break in Monte Negro for vacation, which was a little fancy. So now I’m gonna settle down in Italy for a little while.
J: What’s the best city with the best women? Come on, that’s what people wanna know.
G: To be honest with you, the most attractive women are in Serbia in the summer.
J: Oh really?
G: Yep, by a million. I’ve heard Budva is really good as a vacation spot but we missed the season by like three weeks so I can’t attest to that. But I have it on good authority that Belgrade has the most beautiful women in the world. Like literally, you can go to Zara and you’ll see four supermodels.
J: Wow. Well I’m just gonna go book a ticket to Serbia.
G: Do it. Honestly, yeah.
J: Okay then Gareth, we’ll have to wrap it up there. Like I say, thanks for coming on and well I guess you wanted go to German Street now.
G: Yeah and war with the Germans.
J: Okay, thanks for listening.
Tags: art of the playboy, attraction, bar game, crazy stupid love, dating advice, gareth jones, how to pick up girls, Johnny Cassell, kiss & tell, kiss & tell podcast, seduction, skyfall