How to talk dirty to a girl

March 8, 2017 - 11 minutes read

Tips on Talking Dirty

In the age of widely available porn and the terrible scripts that come with them, dirty talk may seem to be something of a lost art.

However, it is also a powerfully stimulating part of sexual activity and learning to talk dirty can be the key to powerful sex.

Knowing how to talk dirty can transform a relationship of listless dry-humping into a passionate and prolonged connection. The key to sex talk is using suggestion and appealing to the most reactive sexual organ: the imagination.

There’s a few stages to mastering an erotic tongue.

BUILD A FOUNDATION
SET THE SCENE
START ON A COMFORTABLE MEDIUM
PAIR DIRTY TALK WITH OTHER STIMULATION
TAKE OWNERSHIP OF THE TONE
BUT LET HER SET THE BOUNDARIES
DON’T OVERTALK
‘ANCHOR’ PHRASES TO NORMALISE DIRTY TALK

Here’s a breakdown of each stage to sexy talk perfection.

BUILD A FOUNDATION

Dirty talk is only on the cards when sex is on the cards, and there needs to be an implicit trust and comfortable rapport to build into something more driven and passionate.

If the two of you have fun and don’t only talk about sex, you will find that the transition to talking dirty is more natural and playful.

Dirty talking is about making sex a more eagerly anticipated and heightened experience. Sex is about reinforcing a connection. Reinforce that outside of the bed sheets too.

It is important to know a girl and her expectations before you go down this road.

SET THE SCENE

If we’re talking about face-to-face dirty talking during sex, be sure to set a romantic atmosphere.

Keep proceedings lowly lit with downbeat, sexy music playing. Maybe add some incense. As dirty talk is to stimulate a woman’s imagination, set her other senses on fire as well.

Feedback from all of her senses will create an intense experience that will be easy to tie together with dirty talk.

START ON A COMFORTABLE MEDIUM

You have to get comfy dirty talking because anything less than 100% conviction will flatten the atmosphere or lead to you trailing off. Start on a medium you trust, test the waters, and have fun.

If you’ve already got a dynamic connection with a girl, try broaching the topic of sex via WhatsApp, Tinder, or SMS. Dirty texts can be a great way to see where her boundaries are and to be light and flirty to gauge how the tone changes.

Make her imagine what it will be like to go to that level with you, and ramp up the anticipation. A few examples are.

“I can’t wait to f*ck you.”

“I can’t wait for you to see me naked.”

“I can’t wait for you to FEEL me inside”

“I just want to unbutton your blouse and caress your breasts in my hands.”

“We’ve known each other for some time now. Why haven’t we slept with each other yet?”

“I can’t wait for you to feel my body on top of yours.”

“I want to take you to a room, strip your clothes off, and do all sorts of things to you.”

It’s pretty easy to backpedal on a text too. If you are getting signs that she may not be comfortable with this level of verbal intimacy you can send an ‘Aww, I’m sorry, no offence intended – I was just playing around – I’ll go easy on ya xxx’ and more or less extricate yourself from the situation.

Dirty text messages are a fun and exciting safety blanket under which you can establish a seductive scenario, but as with all online flirting, take the relationship offline ASAP.

Text too much filth and you could find yourself on the less favourable side of the ‘creepy’ borderline.

PAIR DIRTY TALK WITH OTHER STIMULATION

Dirty talk works best in the throes of passion when used in conjunction with other techniques to excite. Talk very low and quiet directly into her ear, so she can feel the brief expulsion of a whisper with every word you say.

Be sure to bite, lick, and suck her shoulder/neck between sentences. Grab her hair and run your fingers down her back.

Be stimulating at least three of her senses at once.

TAKE OWNERSHIP OF THE TONE

Like dancing, kissing or pretty much anything to do with girls, they are expecting you to take the lead.

The same applies to pillow talk. If you believe in what you’re saying, and a woman is already sexually excited by you, she is waiting for you to take her to a new level. You, however, have to take her there.

If you’ve had the confidence to take her to bed, you already have the mettle in you to whisper sensual sentiments in her ear.

Also, frame them as compliments. Girls love to feel like goddesses, so oblige – dirty talk does not simply have to be deriding them as ‘f*cking whores’ and slapping them about. If she’s into that – and she will guide you in that direction if she is – then don’t hold back (although have arrangements for a ‘safe word’ or some kind of failsafe if it’s getting too much.)

However, if you are taboo whilst building her confidence too, she is far more likely to feel comfortable with the situation and join you in talking dirty.

Swearing is fine, but not to the exclusion of atmosphere. Dirty talk is all about being upfront and explicit. Examples of dirty sex quotes can include:

“Your breasts are absolutely f*cking perfect.”

“I f*cking love your ass.”

“Your lips are beautiful. I want to feel them on me.”

“I want to put my mouth on every last f*cking bit of you.”

“How does my d*ck feel?”

A great way of owning the tone, as well as getting her imagination going, is asking questions. Ask a woman what she likes, what she thinks of when she sees your penis, ask her not if she wants to be f*cked hard but how hard she wants to be f*cked.

Be assumptive, not aggressive. Even if you get a moan of pleasure in return, it’s working. Don’t think too hard of a list of dirty questions to ask a girl. Just react to the goings on in the bedroom and ask accordingly.

LET HER SET THE BOUNDARIES

Men’s minds go to pretty animalistic places during sex, and while dirty talk is a great way of letting a woman in on it, there’s a limit.

Everyone has their taste boundaries, but I’m imagining you’re the one who wants to go further with talking dirty.

Take it slow, let her get comfortable, and don’t try and push it too hard if she doesn’t feel at ease with a topic.

Also, avoid talking about things like threesomes with her best friends or other women. It might be exciting and what you’re thinking about but you’re shooting repeat sex dead on the spot.

It’s a good idea to sharpen your erotic tongue and mind. Pore through some women’s erotic fiction like 50 Shades of Grey. You don’t have to enjoy the plot. You do have to learn how to think and talk sexier.

DON’T OVERTALK

There isn’t much to this one. Don’t witter on or worry about trying to come up with the slick one-liner you can.

Just focus on the physical side and talk about sexier things quietly and infrequently. Eye contact and erotic touching are far more important.

AFTER YOU PULL IT OFF, DON’T LIMIT ITS USE TO THE BEDROOM

There can be a world to explore within dirty talking, and it can be an intimate way to share your sexual fantasies with someone.

As with any language, it has the power to trigger feelings outside of its context. Repeat some of the dirty things you say when you’re out shopping, or just hanging out.

It’s a fun connection, and reminding a woman of that will settle the notion of dirty talk in her head, as well as ensuring it can continue in the future.

Click here for more information on my 7 Day Course and truly build your confidence in making women light up.

Related Content

https://www.johnnycassell.com/attraction-skills/how-to-talk-to-a-girl-online

https://www.johnnycassell.com/attraction-skills/how-to-talk-to-girls

https://www.johnnycassell.com/attraction-skills/how-to-talk-to-women-and-leave-her-wanting-more

 

training-link