How to make women want you – there’s a question for the ages. Cities have been burnt to the ground over less. Men build their whole lives around impressing women and the ironic trick is to do the exact opposite. I’d like to talk to you about how to get the girl you want.
I read some rather amusing spam comments recently offering spells and hexes regarding how to me a girl like you. I REALLY LIKE GIRL BUT SHE RUN AWAY WITH ANOTHER MAN – DR MUMBO JUMBO CAST SPELL AND SHE COME BACK IN THREE DAYS AND LOVE ME MORE THAN EVER AND I MAKE HAPPIES.
I imagine that there was a brief flicker of optimism that the less astute among us felt reading that – the concept of how to make a girl want you being as easy as enlisting a hack Harry Potter to mutter some words and burn some cat hair. The bad news is magic won’t get you any closer to a bedroom situation. The great news is the real steps as to how to get a girl are just as easy:
1) BE WORTH LIKING
2) SHOW THEM YOU ARE WORTH LIKING
3) APPROACH WITH CONFIDENCE AND PURPOSE
4) BE REACTIVE
5) GIVE THEM JUST ENOUGH TO WANT MORE
6) KISS THEM LIKE YOU MEAN IT
I’ll break down each one for you to give you a clear idea of where you’re going wrong, how to step your game up – and, ultimately, how to get girls.
BE WORTH LIKING
It’s not enough just knowing how to make a girl like you – they like friends, vintage clothes shops and Greek yoghurt too. You have to know how to make a girl want you. She has to be convinced that you are worth investing time and energy into over the hundreds of other guys that may have approached her this year. And before you rush headlong into a defensive tirade, really think about the qualities that you have that would make you a good lover, or at the very least an appealing prospect for a date.
Think of a girl as a corporate investor – she’s not going to sit down with you for a sales pitch (so, a date) unless the product (you) justifies the time taken. She knows she has capital and is being hassled left, right and centre for a chance to convince her to spend it. Why should she choose you?
My 7 Day Course teaches that looks are only the tip of the iceberg. You can be a wise investment for a woman in many other ways – looks, humour, intelligence, culture, financial security, drive – and a strong sense of self awareness means that you can acknowledge your flaws (because no-one is perfect) and work on them.
You’re not funny enough to open? Take an improv course to loosen up. Don’t have much confidence in your intelligence and this leads to a trailing off of conversation? Read some classic books or take an online course in something unusual. Flabby? Work out. If you aren’t willing to step out of your comfort zone to be the best you, how can you expect her to do the same to be with you?
SHOW THEM YOU ARE WORTH LIKING
So you’ve spent some time building a high quality product (you) without thinking about how to get the girl. You have to put your brand out there – and that involves being social, getting out and about and being confident in what you’ve built. Create demand – talk to everyone in the room, introduce people to each other and be sure to shake hands and kiss cheeks. How to get a girl to like you is to make sure she sees you talking to other girls. Make eye contact, then make contacts elsewhere in the room.
Grooming is also key. Apple sells millions of units a years because they look sharp and they’re packaged smartly and tastefully. Invest in some smart, simple suits, get a good haircut and find a deodorant or aftershave that suits you. Keep your breath minty. To make a girl like you, you have to show you’ve invested in yourself.
APPROACH WITH CONFIDENCE AND PURPOSE
When thinking what to say to a girl you like, you cannot underestimate the power of a first impression. If you shuffle into a job interview, eyes averted downwards, and give a limp handshake, you don’t get the job. The same applies when you’re lining up how to make a girl notice you.
Eye contact, an easy smile and relaxed, loose body language will show her how fun you are, and once you start talking you can let her see what’s great about your life.
A great tip as to what to say to a girl you like is talking like you already know each other – act surprised to see her. Even feigned surprise produces a smile and a smile is a great platform for positive body language and convincing conversation.
Then, as soon as you’re gaining momentum, use the key for how to get any girl to like you – excuse yourself and move on to another girl or group of girls.
You don’t have to be a constantly riffing Danny DeVito, but don’t otherthink what to say to a girl you like. Invite her to lead conversation and react accordingly. Don’t think about how to make her want you, make her prove that she’s interesting to you.
If you’re following the steps above, you’ll have spoken to a number of girls in the room, and you’ll have made a strong enough first impression to lead into conversation. You don’t have to have travelled everywhere and seen and done everything but knowing how to react is not only how to make girls want you, but how to know if girls like you.
And if you’re trying to work out how to get a girl to love you, you’re going to have to react to far bigger things over the course of it than a topic of conversation. Ask questions. React broadly. Tie it to your own experiences and empathise. Inject light, reflective humour and don’t be afraid of showing emotions or enthusing over topics you relate to. It can be stressful trying to remember topics and lines. Have fun and flow with the theme of the conversation.
Reacting means you’re reading, and if you’re reading you’ll be far more open to signs of attraction like playing with her own hair and light touching of your elbows and shoulders.
KISS HER LIKE YOU MEAN IT
A kiss can be how to let a girl know you like her. It can be the difference between “I like this girl” and “No, I really like this girl” and it can do the same for her. For a guide on how to become a tonsil tennis pro, click here.
A kiss is not only how to make a girl start thinking about sex, but can be how to make a girl fall for you or even how to make a girl love you. Studies show that people remember their first kiss more vividly than the first time they have sex – and girls are upholding you to those standards.
Don’t be shy about going in – chances are if you just met, you’re alone, and you’re still talking, it means girls like you. It doesn’t have to go all the way the first time you see each other, but a sweet, succinct kiss when you part ways is part of the textbook on how to make a woman want you for a reason.
GIVE THEM JUST ENOUGH TO WANT MORE
If you ran an ice cream shop, and you made the best ice cream in the world, would you give out bowls as samples? Of course not. How to get women is simple: treat them the same way you treat cats. Show enough affection, and enough of what you have to offer them, to make women want you, and then completely ignore them. Talking to other women works,
This works, coincidentally, with both how to make your girlfriend want you more and how to make a girl like you again if you’ve parted ways. Your priority is always the things that make your brand special and keep you happy. Focus on them and be positive and social and they will either fear losing you or never getting you back.
At my 7 Day Course, I’m often asked “How do you get a girl to like you?” How do I get a girl to like me? If I like a girl, I try to spend as little time with them as possible until a date, and even then I would involve other people, maybe swing by a party or gathering and introduce them to new people. Show them your world without giving too much of yourself away.
Central to this is the first step in this post – having a strong foundation in what makes you great. You should be able to give off in five minutes what it can take weeks for someone to see in you, and that’s where confidence comes in.